Friday, 23 February 2007

She Wonders

Lying on dew-soaked grass.
A strand of hair
Across your cheek.

Your laughter
Swept away by the wind.
Gulls’ raucous cries.

Grains of rice
Litter the threshing floor.
Here and there, beetles.

Snowflakes settle
On my hair (once black—
now shades of birch!)


Kelly T said...

Beautiful, Andrew.
Poetic and lovely but...
Not freakin' haikus!?!

- Kelly and James

Lori Langille said...

Have a look at the link to the Modern Haiku Journal (here on the Haiku Blog), to see how flexible the haiku form actually is in English. The 5-7-5 convention that we use here is the easiest form for beginners, but it's not the only form. The one constant of haiku is metaphorical thinking––that is, using the juxtaposition of different images to create a brand new association of ideas. My take on Andrew's poem is that it's a linked (or renga) modern haiku series, with a theme of the seasons in a woman's life. I asked Andrew about this, and he said that while he was writing it he decided that "...the intent of the haiku trumped the constructs of the (5-7-5) form."

But enough theory. What I love about this blog is how, right from the start, everyone has been confident enough to take the set form and themes and apply them in new and unexpected ways. What Andrew did here could very well be what some or all of us will be doing for future themes, should we feel we're bumping up against the constraints of the simple haiku form.